Forget Your Dream Life. Focus On Your Nightmare Life Instead.
Fear motivation can help you get what you want.
Everyone talks about their dream life — financial freedom, a nice car, a big house, a super-fit body, a romantic relationship, and vacations to multiple destinations.
However, these are very generic assumptions of a dream life. What does financial freedom mean to you? How much money do you want to make to become financially free? Where do you want to live? What is your ideal holiday destination?
Figuring it all out can be a challenge. For instance, you know you want to make a lot of money but don’t know the steps to achieve it. That’s a problem. You are unclear even though you have a vague idea of your so-called “dream life.”
It is essential to be clear about what you truly want. You can’t move forward if you are uncertain about your vision. You first need clarity to plan the steps to achieve your dream life.
So first, gain clarity. Figure out precisely what you want. Be specific.
How much money do you want to make?
What car do you want to drive?
Where do you want to live?
What does your ideal body look like?
What do you want your partner to look and be like?
Where do you want to travel?
Now that you are clear about your “dream life,” you must figure out how to achieve that. How do you motivate yourself to take the right actions?
By thinking about your “nightmare life.”
Dream life vs. Nightmare life
You know what your dream life looks like. I want you to also think about your nightmare life. How would your life look like if the worst happened?
You have all these goals and visions for life. What would happen if you didn’t achieve them? Imagine your life if you failed — working at the same tedious job every day, not having financial success, becoming unhealthy, and having no partner to share the love with.
Even thinking of such scenarios makes me scared. I can’t imagine my life of failure. Yes, failure does teach us to become more resilient. It is necessary to achieve the success you want. But what if you can’t get back from failure?
You wouldn’t want such a life for yourself, would you?
Now that you have an idea of your nightmare life, you must start running away. For instance, if you hate your job and know it will not help you achieve financial freedom, you must make an escape plan. That doesn’t mean you quit right away. It will make you broke. Instead, learn to build better financial habits. Saving, investing, building side hustles, and networking should be your top priority. Then, you will know when it’s time to quit. That’s how you run away from your nightmare life.
Your dream life gives you an idea of what you want. Your nightmare life shows you what you don’t want. You can get to where you want to be by avoiding where you don’t want to be.
Fear is often a greater motivator than success.
We all have a fear of failure. We don’t want to end up unsuccessful and not achieve our life goals. We look at fear as a negative feeling. It makes us uncomfortable. So, we want to avoid it and remain in our comfort zones.
However, fear can be a motivation for success. If you look at it in an optimistic approach, you can use it to turn your life around.
Thinking about your nightmare life can be fearful. But as I said, it will help you clarify what you do not want. So, instead of assuming that fear stops you from achieving your dreams, you must use it to become more resilient and focused.
Visualize your nightmare life and then go in the opposite direction. That’s how you get closer to your dream life. Make an escape plan that takes you away from the nightmare. Often, this helps you get what you want without even trying hard.
For example, if becoming overweight is your nightmare, you must start exercising and eating healthily. Because you fear becoming obese, you will take the steps that lead to becoming healthier.
Here’s another example: Suppose your manager is a douchebag. He yells at you and other employees. He is controlling and doesn’t motivate you. Maybe you’ve had similar experiences with other managers in your previous jobs. Your office life is turning into a nightmare. You can’t quit at the moment because you need the money. So, you start to look for other opportunities — maybe a different job or a side hustle. It leads you to the right career path that doesn’t suck your life out. As a result, you become more stable financially. You can get closer to your dream career.
The fear of being overweight led you to exercise and eat healthily. Similarly, the fear of working for a controlling boss led you to find your dream career.
Final thought
Imagine what your dream life looks like to you. How would it be if everything went as planned? That’s, of course, a wonderful feeling. You feel pumped to work on your dream life.
Then, think about your nightmare life. What if you didn’t achieve anything from your dream life? What if everything fell apart? Now that’s a scary feeling.
Which of these would motivate you more?
The first scenario helps you become clear about what you want. But it might not get you the kick you need. You may begin feeling motivated at first. But you might not keep up with the momentum you need to achieve your dream life. Thinking about the nightmare scenario will give you an extra bit of awareness of what you might have to experience if you didn’t achieve what you wanted. And that awareness is what you need to get going.
So, identify your nightmare life and run in the opposite direction to get closer to your dream life.